Sian

Is it really wrong?  Am I actually going to hell, or do you think I can get off with a little time in purgatory?  Okay... I lied.  This morning, I got up, and on my way to work, I stopped at a convenience store in the neighborhood to pick up my caffeine.  I like caffeine.  In any event, the clerk at the convenience store knew me from Evil Grocery Store, where I used to work, and asked if I was still working there.  I said that I wasn't.  When she asked why, I told her that they wouldn't let me have time off to go to school.  So far, so good.  So, her response was, good, if they won't work with you so you can go to school, screw them.  This is a single mother, who's mostly working her ass off to make ends meet, and I know that every class she takes is a hardship for her.  Here's where it gets sticky.  She asked where I was going to school, paused for a second, and named the local community college.  Was I going there?  And I said yes.  Damn it.  The short lies are the easiest.
In any event, she told me that she was planning to go there, and I told her how much she would love it.  (Not a lie.)  Then, I took my drug of choice, and left.
It saved her embarassment, I know, but the reason I did it was because it saved me time and effort.  This is a conversation I've had about a hundred million times, before, and it gets more and more annoying every time.  I already have my bachelor's degree, and I'm working on getting into graduate school.  That much would be fairly easy--and short-- to explain.  When I do, though, the next question is what my major was.  Okay.  Fair enough.  I name my major.  It's in a field so obscure that I couldn't even find a class ring to commemorate the event.  How's that? Next question--and it's always the same.  Nobody's ever, ever willing to admit that they don't know and ask--is either "Oh, you mean, like Shakespeare?" or "What instrument do you play?"  No, I don't mean like Shakespeare, and as we've already discussed, I play the CD player.  Sometimes the radio. 
So, if I'm still interested in being honest, and I feel I have time to explain it, we go into, "No, actually, it's sort of a cross between Literature and History and Anthropology with a healthy dose of linguistics, just for fun."  This usually results in the person nodding, either knowingly, or pretending to know, handing me my bag of groceries, and wishing me a good day.
Why bother?
On the bright side, if I am going to hell, at least I can't think of an appropriate contrapasso for liars.  I despise ironic punishments.

posted by: SianNorah at 13:30 | link | comments (1)

Comments:

#1  02 June 2005 - 22:39

 

i love your writing it's so honest and up front about everything

cloudycow921

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